It would seem as though at institutions of higher learning, commitments to advancing issues of social justice, equity, equality and multicultural engagement are reactionary responses to examples of the contrary. I say this to highlight incidents such as the recent “Compton Cookout” at the University of California San Diego and the subsequent noose hanging meant to intimidate Black Students through base understandings of bigotry and hatred. Unfortunately we don’t even have to limit the scope of understanding to analyzing the left coast. A much closer example would be the Black History Month themed party at Notre Dame entitled “G’z and Purple Drank”. Without the intention of a pun, these parties would be easier to swallow if they took place far outside the reach of higher learning. Sadly this is not the case. These events which contribute to and distribute widespread ignorance simply leads individual understanding of diversity and multiculturalism to be defined by stereotypical boxes that confine the existence of culture and community to the comedy of color; a phrase which here means the unfortunate and shameful caricatures which are far too frequently perpetuated in the media. The very same imagery which is played out consistently in movies and print advertisements and commercials are the same shackles of shame that institutions dedicated to education do nothing to dispel. The hatred and intimidation endured by marginalized and oppressed communities is celebrated seemingly more than the achievements since the time when such acts were not prohibited. The side effect has thus become creating victims of history on one side and institutions as abettors of its repetition on the other. This realization should be evident after a laundry list of racially motivated incidents display swift reaction but little to no pro-activity. Furthermore, one could argue that in standing idly by, assuming race and social justice are low ranking issues on college campuses means effectively we do very little to stop the spread of hate yet do everything to incubate it.

Incidents like the one at UCSD in February 2010, The stabbing of Sean Osborne at University of Louisville in April of 2009, Racial Profiling at Harvard in August 2008, the racially motivated attack at Westchester Community College in December of 2008, like the Korean-American attacked at Washington State in February of 2008, the “Gangsta” party at Clemson where blackface and malt liquor was present in January of 2007, or the Noose found on a professor’s office door at Columbia in October of 2007 show that diversity has been acknowledged and education has been had, but negativity has shaped their context and the climate because university administrators failed to take a positive lead.

http://www.theloop21.com/news/map-incidents-racism-college-campuses



In other words, a lack of commitment to diversity and half-hearted approach to increasing awareness often furthers the ignorance because we cease to scratch beneath the surface of what’s necessary to buck the trend. We celebrate diversity only when appropriate, and discourage dialogue about what’s difficult. We develop brick and mortar associations dedicated to communication skills, critical thinking, application of knowledge, value and ethics but only in so far as academics alone will direct when it comes to social justice and multiculturalism. We limit our celebration of culture to fashion shows and food and avoid the deeper discussions of their place within a particular heritage in the interest of time. The basis of what makes Asian, Latino, Native American and Black cultures unique is then relegated not only to a month but to museum style study that limits engagement to what’s interesting and “fun”. Conversations of oppression, sexism, discrimination and racism are avoided in favor of “feel good & fuzzy”; a faux commitment which does everyone a disservice. What seems most disheartening is the fact that recognizing the lack of commitment comes at the expense of students. A Latino male who has to hear that the bathroom needs to be cleaned when he’s mistaken for a maintenance man or a janitor by a professor who is educated solely by stereotypes; or an instructor who tells a black student that they can be excused to finish their drug deal when a phone rings during a test. The community feels the sting of insensitivity when Native American Heritage Month is advertised with mascots, face paint and Pocahontas imagery with Totem Poles, Teepee’s and Tomahawks. We put on programming for the students to make them feel “included” for 28 to 30 days of sporadic mention yet for the remaining 300 or so days they suffer in silence because of lack of statistical significance. Limited objectivity led someone to rally the troops and suggest to these colleges that we honor these communities and their contributions to society by hosting heritage and history months, but in reality the entire year needs to be dedicated to campus wide discussion, dialogue and earnest engagement in progressing an inclusive mentality that doesn’t limit anyone to arms length capacity for understanding.

Maybe then we could establish a mentality that the absence of evidence is not the evidence of absence. We can no longer take solace in the absence of incident as evidence of achievement! We need to have persistent dialogue and engagement to push beyond tolerance to concrete understanding. Diversity has to be more than words, food and clothes it needs to be action. As educators we have an opportunity to reach beyond the communities immediately within our reach. How can we expand the impact? Diversity can't be limited to spaces and high paid positions. It has to be lived. We can’t check off structures and programs as resources that address diversity, we have to participate in the construction of a reality that makes diversity celebrated and not demonstrated. We have to engage in work that allows social justice to feel attainable and not an uphill battle no one wants to wage from years of fatigue. Racism, sexism, discrimination and oppression are parts of a socially constructed hierarchy of dominant and subordinate culture; a constructed reality of what is good and bad, better than or inferior. We’re educators. We’re student affairs professionals and researchers. Maybe for a change of pace we should table the theoretical and conceptual and attack the injustice we’ve avoided for far too long. Move beyond the heritage months, go beyond the divisions of diversity, no one position or building will hamper these issues from arising. We must do more.

A colleague of mine forwarded this to me. I had no choice but to respond...

Subject: FW: UCSD Black Student Union Protest (February 19th, 2010)

Fellas,

Idk if you saw this already but check out the student protest and an article about the "Compton Party". I pasted one response from a person, obviously white. Its interesting viewing it from another perspective.

There are racially themed parties thrown all the time at every college, every weekend!
Our society is full of ghetto people right? Doesn't necessarily mean we are talking about black people every time the word ghetto is brought up. Question, if you ask anyone, how is Compton portrayed in the mass media? Go to youtube and type in Compton and see what comes up. As the looks of it, they were justifying what its like in Compton. I'm not saying it's unfortunate that the description of the invitation matches the appearance of Compton; the individuals associated with the city seems somewhat proud of their appearance and continue to flaunt it with pride. In my opinion, a part of black history was celebrated in this BBQ. If they're going to make such a big deal about it, the should put this much effort into changing the image of Compton so the [right image] of a Compton BBQ could be thrown accepted by society. As far as I see it, great job with the BBQ; it's exactly how Snoop Dogg, WC, Ice Cube, B.E.T, 2pac, and hundreds of other people of influence has described life in this city. If you don't want things to happen like this again, then you should once again take control of black people, especially in Compton since its essentially been done before, and tell them lose their identity so no one emulates them through a party.

http://www.10news.com/news/22588063/detail.html

http://www.facebook.com/#!/video/video.php?v=842662959544&ref=nf

Here's what I have to say about that...

That whole comment is a cop-out. What it speaks to is a dominant vs. subordinate culture constructed by our society which holds blacks to a “ghetto” stereotype regardless of what statistics typify the moniker. If only 15% of the culture exhibits the “B.E.T.” style of dress, speech and shenanigans; we’re still held to that standard because dominant society chooses to depict the ignorance over the brilliance of black culture. That’s not accidental or coincidental, it’s socially genocidal. It’s contributing to a continental glass ceiling that encapsulates the most articulate and well intentioned African Americans every time they step on an elevator alone with a single white female as they instinctively clutch their purse.

This same fate does not befall the average white male as they are not readily compared to the meth producer and dealer, or the scantily clad, mullet wearing, toothless wife beater on cops which made the a-shirt so infamous. We don’t lump them with country western listening, rodeo attending, gun rack accessorizing Ford truck drivers with confederate flags brandished colorfully on the roof. Why? Because not only are they afforded the luxury of white privilege but of being a member of a dominant society that readily accepts and broadcasts a spectrum of cultures and sub cultures within a race or group of people. They are not limited to being defined by images of their public or private shame. They have the advantage of saying, “we’re not all like that”; bad or good, and society knowingly accepting that response without judgment.

So to justify the ridiculous theme of this party by highlighting the subculture exhibited within Compton, California by commenting on what highly paid rappers would condone only further displays a disconnect with reality and a lack of commitment to multicultural engagement on his part. The bottom line? It was a party to celebrate black history by mocking someone’s culture. How can you give a pat on the back for black-face minus the paint? No one was shuckin’ and jiving, or steppin’ fetch it…but if they c-walk with a doo-rag on and a 40 in hand instead of a sliver of watermelon…how is that different?

I fail to see how that’s our fault. My fault or anyone else’s. As a country we need to do better. But as disappointed as I am by the 40 year old man who still sags with a belt firmly around his ankles, he doesn’t represent me. I just need the rest of the world to knowingly accept that response without judgment. His institution of higher learning should support that goal.

Need proof?



Why do we always have to be dancing?



is this where it all began?



my personal favorite...



Dancing African artifacts? C'mon son...Unfortunately, the good people under the golden arches are equal opportunity offenders. We saw how black kids eat, now let's see how Asian children eat McNuggets!

Granted, we haven't experienced this level of racism on our campus as blatantly...BUT COME ON!

It exists in forms of ignorance I cannot express or come up with words to eloquently explain. I remember doing a case study in my theory class with a similar topic dealing with students preparing an event featuring chit'lin dinners and a menu with misspelled words. I thought "surely this wouldn't happen in 2009"...I was right.

It happens in 2010.

Disgusting. THIS is why Black History Month is and will always be important. Not only do people fear what they don't understand, but in total ignorance, they mock it and are perverse in their attempts to show their willingness to bridge the gap, or even their fearlessness in embracing diversity (*GAG*).

With Harry Reid, John Mayer, Don Imus, Micheal Richards and Dog the Bounty Hunter...how can anyone ignorantly say that the world is color-blind or that we live in a post-racial society when not only are public figures caught in ignorance but the most INSENSITIVE ACTS EVER RECORDED still take place amongst "educated" citizens on a university campus.

Wow...just wow. And we still have only black students at black history events.

just...read below SMH

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Student's blog that set everything in motion --> http://blackgirlindiego.blogspot.com/2010/02/i-need-your-help.html

Below is a description of an event by UCSD's Greek Community "In honor of Black History Month..." Please help me by a) re-posting on your blogs and or b) e-mailing the president of UCSD's Inter-fraternity Council to let them know that this is UNACCEPTABLE!!!

"New Low for UCSD"
[PLEASE keep in mind that today, UCSD has about 200 Black students PERIOD.... out of about 20,000 undergrads. yes.......closer to 1% than 2%]

Description
February marks a very important month in American society. No, i'm not referring to Valentines day or Presidents day. I'm talking about Black History month. As a time to celebrate and in hopes of showing respect, the Regents community cordially invites you to its very first Compton Cookout.

For guys: I expect all males to be rockin Jersey's, stuntin' up in ya White T (XXXL smallest size acceptable), anything FUBU, Ecko, Rockawear, High/low top Jordans or Dunks, Chains, Jorts, stunner shades, 59 50 hats, Tats, etc.

For girls: For those of you who are unfamiliar with ghetto chicks-Ghetto chicks usually have gold teeth, start fights and drama, and wear cheap clothes - they consider Baby Phat to be high class and expensive couture. They also have short, nappy hair, and usually wear cheap weave, usually in bad colors, such as purple or bright red.
They look and act similar to Shenaynay, and speak very loudly, while rolling their neck, and waving their finger in your face. Ghetto chicks have a very limited vocabulary, and attempt to make up for it, by forming new words, such as "constipulated", or simply cursing persistently, or using other types of vulgarities, and making noises, such as "hmmg!", or smacking their lips, and making other angry noises,grunts, and faces.
The objective is for all you lovely ladies to look, act, and essentially take on these "respectable" qualities throughout the day.

Several of the regents condos will be teaming up to house this monstrosity, so travel house to house and experience the various elements of life in the ghetto.

We will be serving 40's, Kegs of Natty, dat Purple Drank- which consists of sugar, water, and the color purple , chicken, coolade, and of course Watermelon. So come one and come all, make ya self before we break ya self, keep strapped, get yo shine on, and join us for a day party to be remembered- or not.


UCSD's Greek Advisor is Emily Feinstein: eufeinstein@ucsd.edu
UCSD's IFC President is Tommy Allen: tgallen@ucsd.edu
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

according to .black.girl.in.diego's blog the university sent this e-mail out in a mass response...

All UCSD employees just got the following email. Of course, we had no idea what it was about. But thanks to the blogging world, I'm up to speed. Disgraceful.

UCSD
CAMPUS NOTICE
University of California, San Diego


OFFICE OF THE CHANCELLOR

OFFICE OF THE VICE CHANCELLOR - STUDENT AFFAIRS


February 16, 2010


ALL ACADEMICS AND STAFF AT UCSD
ALL STUDENTS AT UCSD

SUBJECT: Condemnation of Off-Campus Party and Affirmation of Principles
of Community

We were distressed to learn that over the weekend an offensively themed
student party, mocking the commemoration of Black History Month, took
place off campus. We strongly condemn this event and the blatant
disregard of our campus values. Although the party was not a UC San
Diego student-organization sponsored event, participants did include UC
San Diego students and that causes us great concern.

As stated in our Principles of Community,
http://blink.ucsd.edu/HR/policies/POC/principles-of-community.html, we
reject acts of discrimination based on race, ethnicity, gender, age,
disability, sexual orientation, religion, and political beliefs, and, we
will confront and appropriately respond to such acts. We reaffirm our
Principles of Community
http://blink.ucsd.edu/HR/policies/POC/principles-of-community.html and
encourage the campus to join us in our affirmation.

In addition, we invite students, staff and faculty to participate in a
teach-in from noon to 2 p.m. on February 24 in the Price Center East
Ballroom to explore how such incidents continue to occur today and to
discuss the importance of mutual respect and civility on our campus.


Marye Anne Fox
Chancellor

Penny Rue
Vice Chancellor - Student Affairs
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I SINCERELY hope we would never experience anything like this on our campus...but I'm sure San Diego thought the same thing. What do you think of this kind of racist ignorance perpetuated on a COLLEGE CAMPUS no less? Where's their diversity statement?


There's another question that begs an answer. I know that these students should be ashamed for their ignorance...but what responsibility do we have as individuals who perpetuate the stereotypes? I remember a while ago that Chris Rock said he "loved black people, but hates niggas"...I echoed his sentiments. Sadly, "Niggaz" are all that is shown on television by and large. The gold teeth and do-rags in public. Jeans with a belt tightened firmly around the knees (c'mon son). Nikki Minaj is the poster girl for pink weave. I'm all about rebellious fashion statements, but some looks that have typified the "black culture" are simply what we wear around the house and step outside in (i.e. house shoes at the super-market or a robe to pick your kids up from school with rollers in your hair). Look how our children talk!?!?



Look how we act in public, even at sporting events!




They cancelled "Hot Ghetto Mess" on BET with Charlie Murphy because they felt we put too much of our business in the street. But damn...I'm starting to feel like Cosby. Maybe our business is already in the street. We need to stop the madness. We've GOT to do better. It would be different if these individuals from Pi Kappa Alpha were mocking black culture intentionally, but this is honestly what they think being black is all about!



Are we honestly seen as shuck and jive? Will the dominant vs. subordinate theory always envelope our people and reduce the black experience to fashion trends? What other culture is defined by the way they dress or talk? Blacks are the only people who accuse one another of talking White. But it seems like the hip thing to do to talk black. Have you ever heard of a party where you dress like a Cholo? Or an Asian Barbecue where you dress like a stereotypical Asian? If you have, kick the dude who made the invite squarely in the throat because it's just as racist. My point is, the black stereotype being emphasized in the media is much more prevalent. What do we do? Many black people celebrate it and relish in it. Making the stereotypes even more pronounced. Hell, we could go into the recent label whore fashion trend where you're covered from head to toe in Gucci, Fendi, Prada and Louis Vuitton...but it's no different than when it was Nautica, Tommy Hilfiger, Guess and Polo back in the late 90's.

True, it's not fair that we be expected to uphold a standard when no other culture seemingly has to abide by them. Are there stereotypes for Latinos, Asians, Native Americans and Gays in America? Absolutely. But none of those stereotypes revolve around the blatant examples of ignorance shown above.

Someone's gotta kill the babysitter. Stop letting BET videos dictate how black you are and who is black enough. I can't even blame them entirely because WE SUPPORT THE IGNORANCE! Stop teaching our kids to dance before teaching them to read. Stop spending your tax check on things that don't appreciate with value and invest in your or for God's sake your child's future! Am I outraged at the level of racism that is currently exhibited across our country in the same era as our first black president?!?! Absolutely. But I'm also saddened that after 439 years of captivity, Jim Crow, the civil rights movement and countless victories for equality and equity for black people, we still do so much damage to ourselves.

So this black history month, don't just educate yourself. Educate everyone you can. Black and White (I know sometimes how taxing that can be). Latino, Asian, Native American and any subculture in between.

Collectively, we've got to do better.

Okay, let me tell you why this commercial is so epic. It's the funniest commercial that aired during the Superbowl. Period. Why? Because the comedic timing is impeccable and the ability to say any of this with a straight face makes you more of a legend than Will Smith and a dog surviving a bio-nuclear attack in a post-apocalyptic zombie infested metropolis. I digress.

This commercial also signifies something very important. Usually you'll see advertising campaigns with dual marketing. Take McDonalds for instance. They're infamous for this. They have the advertisements they run on ABC, NBC, CBS, Oxygen, Lifetime, Spike TV and USA...then they have the advertisements they air on BET or on VH1 during "For the Love of Ray J". The difference? One is of a good old American, wholesome family in a mini-van pulling up to the drive thru arguing only to have the dispute settled by the warm caress of two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles and onions on a sesame seed bun. Or maybe two orders of chicken nuggets, a happy meal and an ice cold Coca-Cola drenched from condensation. Mouthwatering and good clean fun...

Then you get the BET version. Everyone is on a basketball court, or rapping. The last attempt was an R&B crooner singing about McNugget Lovin'. I swear if I see that McNugget commercial with the black couple in the log cabin free-styling about sweet and tangy sauce again I'm getting my nunchucks. And why is it only Chicken McNuggets we're singing about!?!? What are you trying to say!?!? I mean,...*sigh*, I digress...



Back to Old Spice. This is the Superbowl. More people watch this singular event than any other sporting event arguably in the United States. Not only that, but the cost of a 30-second ad on the Super Bowl has skyrocketed from $600000 in the mid-'80s to an estimated $2.6 million for this past Sunday's game. So you mean to tell me, Old Spice thought enough of the black community to not only make a black man a spokesperson, but the feature sex symbol as well?!? Not that I'm unaware of the legendary genital prowess associated with black men or their over publicized and stereotyped male libido, but they said smell like a man smells. Not a black man, a man. It wasn't coonish or buffoonery. It was funny, but universally. Anyone can relate to the campy style without perpetuating any negative societal beliefs. I can honestly say that if you were to insert an Asian man or a Latino man in this commercial it would be just as effective. For once, I didn't see race as the driving force behind the commercial.

I had a bone to pick with Old Spice for a minute for naming their new sent Swagger without a single black man in sight. But now? I think I may buy a few bottles. In essence, they did their job and for once, I'm not offended. But I bet you already knew that.

Just when Bill Cosby writes off America's youth and the counter-productive parents who lavish them with worldly goods instead of raising them. Here comes Jonathan E. McCoy.

I first need to say I haven't said the 'N Word' since 2006, maybe earlier. I get into frequent debates with peers, hood scholars, Afrocentric slam poets and professors about the appropriateness of the racial slur and it's modern day implementation. Personally, I have no interest uttering an epithet that was the last likely word heard before 14 year old Emmett Till was brutally slain. It's the last word heard before men were hanged like so much strange fruit leaving the stench of death and injustice throughout the south. Its the words heard as black women who bore the children of their slave owners heard; shortly before the master's wife ordered her punished with a cat o' nine rending her back flesh in twine. It's the likely words which crossed the lips of the man who struck the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. or the assassin who took his life on the balcony of the Lorraine Motel.



Why would I want to use the same word used to paint African American's as ignorant, lazy, shiftless, worthless and inhuman...as a term of endearment for my friends, family or loved-ones?

Unfortunately, this argument has won over a few, and only served as fuel to the fire for others who see my stance as nothing more than empowerment of a word many blacks take ownership of almost as if to say "we take back the pain and the hurt it's caused and it's ours now, and if anyone but us uses it to inflict injury, we reserve the right to be hostile."

I never advocate violence, but I know many people who would jump at the opportunity to defend the hypocrisy should an overzealous white male or female utter the five or six letter version of the dreaded 'N'.

Nas wanted to title his last LP N*****. Damon Wayans of "My Wife & Kids" and the same Wayans family that revolutionized the sketch comedy genre in the 90's with "In Living Color", actually attempted to purchase the right to the word to use as the title of a clothing line.


...seriously...


This is off topic, barely, but could you imagine people walking around with N***** (minus the asterisks) in the mall and in gymnasiums or on street corners? Talk about perpetuating a stereotype by dressing the part *smh*

...Anyway, thank god for Jonathan McCoy. Although his open petition to physically 'DELETE' the 'N-Word' from our vocabulary. I support him wholeheartedly. I agree, words do have power. We don't take power from them by giving use to some but not to others, because we can't enforce it's privileged use and the ignorance continues in circles regardless of our watchful eye.

Why not eradicate the word to keep future generations from using it or knowing of it's existence? It's not exactly an element of black history we should fight to remember. Honestly, in a world where people know no significance to March 5th and Crispus Attucks, no clue who or how anyone other than Rosa, Martin and Malcolm contributed to Black History; and have very little concept of black history whatsoever except the trilogy of "we were in Africa, we were slaves, now we're free".

Hooray, we can drink from the same water fountain...

Meanwhile, one of the most deleterious words in the English language is being debated as to whether or not it's existence should be permitted...BY THE VERY PEOPLE IT CONTINUOUSLY INJURED FOR 439 YEARS OF CAPTIVITY, JIM CROW AND BEYOND!!!!


For those of you whom argue that the word's origin in Africa and had much more positive and princely associations...

I would argue that those of us who use it here, especially who are melanin challenged, aren't using the African dictionary version. Not to mention, that this is not Africa. The history of the word here, has always been negative. No matter how much we've tried to spin it, minority management of the word has not eradicated the hurt it can and has caused.

Tupac Shakur attempted to make N.I.G.G.A.Z. stand for "Never Ignorant Getting Goals Achieved", yet it somehow failed to live as a viable explanation despite his mythic legacy.

NWA perhaps made the word more popular than any other rap act in history between 1985 and 1998. With their second album "Straight Outta Compton" and it's social and political commentary reminiscent of the Hip Hop classic, Grandmaster Flash & The Furious Five's "The Message", NWA turned the world on it's ear with a pronounced middle finger pointed at the police and an establishment that ignores the societal ills of ghetto life.

However, revolutionary intent or not, what people fail to realize is that the demographic purchasing and listening to Rap & Hip Hop music most is not African American, but White. The very same group Blacks try so desperately to keep from uttering the 'N' through fear, intimidation and the promise of a very serious ass whipping.


When will we learn? 10 year old Jonathan McCoy has it right. He's got his head on straight years ahead of many of us. But why stop there?

(read this sentence with caution, abusive language within:)

Let's get rid of Chink, Wet-Back, Wigger, Honkey, Gook, Beaner, Spook, Queer, Fag, Cunt, Slut and Whore in addition to the 'N'.

I'm sure someone is reading this thinking "People will just come up with something else to call people. Deleting these words isn't going to make a difference in people's opinions/fears/insecurities about difference."

You may be right. But in order to achieve something you've never had before, you have to do something you've never done before.


Let's join Jonathan in pressing a collective backspace on expressions of hate. Unless you like maintaining the status quo that is...

So my friend Tabitha messages me on Facebook with a rather cryptic message so ambiguous that I didn't entirely know what she was referring to:

Tabitha: "care to weigh in on the status....think we need some of your advice"

I wasn't sure if she was talking about my status or hers, but since mine was as non-specific as her question, I ventured to read her status, which would explain her follow up response to my question, "Who's we?":

Tabitha: "you'll see once you read the comments"

Needless to say, her status was a guaranteed barn burner for any "civil" debate amongst African American Males and Females

Tabitha: is disturbed by the conversation she had with a man that said that he would prefer to be with a black woman but that we have too many issues and that it is easier to be with a woman of another ethnicity... really??? Grow up and stop making excuses the road to finding the right one is never easy regardless of color...but hey maybe I'm wrong.

ooooookay...That's deep. But nothing I'm unfamiliar with. I've heard stories since I was in high school from my black friends on the Football team, the Basketball team, the Wrestling team...hell even Student Council all about how white women were supposed to be so docile and easy to get along with and sexually amenable to almost any suggestion. Then in College I heard stories about how domestic and over anxious to please Asian women are and how their greatest wish is to please their man. Once I graduated from undergrad, the ethnic dating game took on a new holy grail; Latina's "They've got all the fiestiness of a black woman with much less lip, they're extremely domestic, explosive lovers and CAN COOK!!"

...my homeboy's words...not mine. I've even had "friends" of mine suggest that I'd be better suited to a Latina woman just based on my temperament.

I'm being completely forthright here. Have I dated outside my own race? Absolutely. A white woman? yes. An Asian woman? She was Pakistani, but yes it's in Asia so for the purpose of this argument, I'll count it. Have I dated a Latina? Got the prom pics to prove it. But what does any of this mean?

Either I'm the outlier or black men are some outright liars. Even though I've dated women of many cultures and nationalities, my longest, most substantial and most fulfilling relationships have always been with Black Women. And just as every other woman I've dated their "domestication", sexual prowess or ability to cook has never come into play as far as the decision making process. Hell...I'll cook my own meal if it comes down to a good woman.

So this bring us back to the heart of the matter. As pro-black and as militant as I come across and in many ways am; I see no problem with interracial dating. I do however have issue with race-preferential dating. That to me is the silliest version of reverse racism I've ever seen in my life.

It's just as dumb as the justifications given to dating a White, Asian or Latina by men as it is ridiculous for the white woman we've all met who wants to marry a black or puerto rican so her son can have tan skin and "good hair" (see my good hair entry). I feel as though the whole genetic breeding thing could be another blog entry in itself but here it's still applicable.

You don't date like you shop for cars. Do you realize how insensitive and de-humanizing that is? People buy foriegn cars because they have less "issues" than say a Ford or Chevy...is that really how we wish to discuss our women? I guess it makes sense. Kanye said it best.

"when he get on, he leave yo ass for a white gurl"...hell, he did it!

So the road gets rough, or you mess up and you get your clothes burned up with "I'm Not Gon' Cry" blaring in the background, or you get your shoes burned up in a tub Left-Eye and Andre Risen style (why do all these stories end up in flames?). The pattern I see in destructive relationships where black women have "issues" is when black men do things to make black women act crazy.

I'll admit, some women are crazy when you get them, but even still it's due in some part to the crazy left behind by another man from her past in that as yet unpacked baggage...

but none of this is mentioned as to home-boy's reasoning for not dating the darker complexioned "fairer sex"...

One of Tabitha's male friends coined in on the conversation offering to stick up for the root of the conversation and offered the following:

Mike: Don't judge it's just that some times black females have been taught to be so independant that they somtimes mix it up with ratical anger ...They become so so self progressive that they do not even take the time to realize that the Black male is being left behind in so many ways because of lack of male leadership......MANY young black men are AND ... Read Morebeing taught how to surive from a STONG BLACK (WOMAN) who somtimes teach the male the sadness of what SHE has lived of being self sufficcient without the need of any man in their life..That only goes to say that a black man only learns what he has been taught..How he will NOT BE THAT SUPER MALE... lol

I hate to go against guy code, but I have to disagree...Even though you had a lot of good points which I will expound on, the black man getting left behind is not the black woman's fault. It's the black man's.

We've all heard the phrase "women are raised, men are nurtured"...we've bought into the B.S. for so long that we feel threatened by a woman who doesn't necessarily need us? I don't want a woman who needs me. My children can need me, but in a partnership I don't want a dependent. I don't want a cling-on either. I want a woman who's just as strong as my mother is. At times if need be even stronger than me. Not to say that I'm weak, but I want my woman strong in other ways. That's the difference between a 'docile' woman and a virtuous one.

It's not the black woman's fault if there are no men in the home to raise men. Where are the men? If you have 4 babies by 4 different women that's your fault not the woman's. Is she supposed to just let any man help raise her babies because the father doesn't feel like it? Or let's blame society for the systematic dismantling of the black community as our jails fill up with more and more black fathers causing a rapid decay of the moral foundation of our once and future proud black neighborhoods.

I'm sure every inmate was pinched for walking an old lady across the street...maybe they were in the wrong place at the wrong time just planting a tree on Arbor Day.

Stop making excuses. If you don't like a black woman because you think they're ugly, cool. At least you're honest. Acknowledge you're color-struck and push on. If you think they're too progressive and you've been left behind? Hop over that Dairy Queen counter and pick up a University Application and apply yourself to something other than an Online Madden Tournament.

I refuse to make excuses for why you think a black woman isn't good enough. They're good enough for White men. They're good enough for Asian men, and they're definitely good enough for Latino men. So what we're really saying is that Black Women don't have too many issues, what we're saying is that Black Men have so many issues that we'd rather stand in our own way and make excuses for our own inadequacies, because everyone else is the problem, not us. We're the victim...

How long do we need to be nurtured before we learn to be raised? Because once you get done running the streets and tasting all 31 flavors, I don't doubt it'll be that chocolate that you crave.

Yes. Black women are stronger and more independent than female counterparts from other ethnicity. Not all, but in my experience by and large. But this all goes back to the history.

Who had to sit by as the husband was castrated and hung trying to comfort the children? Before that who had to remain strong while the family was split apart by the slave trade? Who was it who kept two houses clean while nursing her own and the master's babies? Who watched the children and tucked them in while the husbands were fighting for equality in the struggle? When Men didn't have the intestinal fortitude to do a Woman's job, it was courageous individuals like Angela Davis and Harriet Tubman who led the way. Our black women are doing it for themselves because 9/10 THEY HAVE TO! Wouldn't that give you a few issues? A few bones to pick?

I will say this though, it is far too much self-fulfilling prophecy to say "I can do bad all by myself"

...yes you could, but who the hell wants to? If it will allow a man to buck a challenge? You'll be doing bad alone for quite a long time.

I just don't understand why we can't appreciate a black woman the way a black woman appreciates a black man.

I can appreciate a black woman because she's one of few women on earth who can appreciate me, understand my struggle and relate to me on a geographical, political and emotional level that forever shakes us to the soul. I will agree that some women have it ingraned so far in their mind that black men aren't to be trusted. They'll cheat, they'll lie, they'll leave you, they're shiftless, good for nothing, no count fathers, downright lazy, trifling, opportunistic and ambition less just to name a few.

But the quickest way to remedy any of that? Is to not be any of the above. It's called self responsibility. A black woman can appreciate how hard it is and has been for the black man. Most of that love and adoration is for things we've endured past tense. How about we love and appreciate our women for what they endure right now.

Take my advice with a grain of salt, but if your dating preferences hinge off of your stereotypes about who has issues? It's best you not date. We don't want people like you pro-creating anyway. EVERYONE has issues regardless of race. You just have the luxury of not understanding it when it comes to someone else's struggle.

So don't run from the challenges we left. The woman you claim you can't love due to issues is due greatly to the ones you can't address.

Simply put? Grow a set...next.

I know I'm late. But everyone is asking me to weigh in on this so I'm gonna go ahead and take a swing at it. Truthfully? Knowing the level of harassment that police extend to African Americans, I wasn't surprised that this occurred. I'm more surprised that people are so appalled at President Obama for having an opinion on the subject. I'm more upset that Glenn Beck is insinuating that Barack Obama dislikes white people because he said the officers "acted stupidly". And Lou Dobbs using his platform to drum up already debunked theories that Barack Obama is not an American citizen because he was born in Hawaii. But I'll go in order of offense.

Henry Louis Gates, Jr. -an American literary critic, educator, scholar, writer, editor and public intellectual. He's the first African American to recieve the Andrew W. Mellon Foundation Fellowship and has recieved countless honorary degress and awards for his teaching and development of academic institutions to study black culture.

• In 2002, Gates was selected to give the Jefferson Lecture, in recognition of his "distinguished intellectual achievement in the humanities." The lecture resulted in his 2003 book, The Trials of Phillis Wheatley.
  
• As the host of the 2006 and 2008 PBS television miniseries African American Lives, Gates explored the genealogy of prominent African Americans.
  
• Gates sits on the boards of many notable arts, cultural, and research institutions.
  
• He serves as the Alphonse Fletcher University Professor at Harvard University, where he is Director of the W.E.B. Du Bois Institute for African and African American Research.
• Micheal Kinsley referred to him as "the nation's most famous black scholar."
  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Henry_Louis_Gates
  

I add these facts to say that "Skip" isn't just some random black guy. He's an American Scholar. He's noted. He's famous. HE WORKS FOR HARVARD!!! This point isn't even significant save for the fact that authorities from Harvard University assisted in the arrest.

According to the police report released on The Smoking Gun:
Cops responded to Gates's house after neighbor Lucia Whalen reported spotting "two black males with backpacks" trying to gain entry to the home (Gates, returning home from a trip overseas, and his driver were contending with a stuck front door). The Cambridge Police Department reports, authored by Sergeant James Crowley and Officer James Figueroa, quote an incensed Gates yelling, "This is what happens to black men in America!," and, when asked by Crowley to speak with him outside the residence, Gates replied, "ya, I'll speak with your mama outside." A disorderly conduct rap was filed against Gates, but quickly dropped by prosecutors. Gates is reportedly considering legal action against the Cambridge police.
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0723092gates1.html


Gates, however "incensed" he may have been; had every right to be. He had the police called on him by his own neighbor and arrested in his own home for attempting to get in through a less than cooperative door.

I was asked by a student on Facebook who questioned Obama's "Beer Diplomacy" tactics whether or not this would be such an issue if a black arresting officer would have treated a white professor the same way. I feel just as comfortable answering that question here as I did in his stream of status comments.

Plainly stated, this wouldn't have happened if it were a black arresting officer and a white college professor. The facts in the case would be totally different. If police would have arrived on the scene to see a white professor and his driver, they would've been given the benefit of the doubt. The police would've probably assisted him in getting into his home and stuck around for coffee and pastry as they laughed about the misunderstanding.

Worse yet, there would be no call to the police. Ms. Whalen would've known the White professor Gates to be a pilar of the community and a fine upstanding citizen. She probably would have come out on the porch to see if she could be of help and invited him in to call a locksmith.

But none of the aforementioned scenarios occured. Do you know why? Ask Skip:
"This is what happens to black men in America!,"

Mr. Beck...


So Barack Obama has a problem... a deep seeded aggression against white people? I'm still trying to figure out why Gates or Obama deserves to give Crowley an apology. I think that Fox News has a hard time distingushing fact from fiction because someone is lying here. The police report says that the caller described two African American men with backpacks breaking into a home. Now all of a sudden the 911 tapes reflect her not knowing what the nationality of the men were. If we live in such a post-racial society where American's don't see color, why is the nationality of the alleged perpetrators important at all? Why not say, I see some suspicious activity going on at my neighbors house and leave it at that. No, that's not the cause for alarm. It's that there are two black men in my neighborhood. They look like they're trying to break in.

Glenn Beck is an idiot. I'm sorry. This is subject for debate of course, but American's DO see color. You plainly state that he's hired all these black-liberationist people to support him in diplomacy roles and you almost exposed yourself. "Show me who you hang around and I'll show you your peop- future"...

Huh? So if I show you who I hang around, I'll show you my people. So Obama's people are Jeremiah Wright and Oprah, but they're also Rahm Emanuel, they're also Sonia Sotomyor, they're also Joe Biden. The American people are his people. Our people. No one differentiates in this equation but you Glenn.

And no I don't think all cops are corrupt. I do however think cops shoot first and ask questions last. Look at the track record. Sean Bell, Oscar Grant... Omar Edwards was a police officer himself. His chief offense? Holding a gun and being black.

So what have you learned Glenn? American's do see color, so did your caller. If you're gonna make someone look in the mirror and call them a racist, turn the mirror on yourself first. If you come to a stop-light at an intersection and you know when to stop and go, you see color. We're not made to live in a politically correct world. We're made to live in a civilized one. And if you beg for a world where white men can call black men niggers and not be penalized for it, if assassination of body and character are on the side of right, then I suggest you high tail it back to the era of Jim Crow. To quote a phrase "this ain't that".

Lou Dobbs...



Almost lost your cotton picking mind for a minute, eh Lou? Epic Fail.
Someone get this man a teleprompter.

This just proves you can't take anything this man says regarding race seriously. So he's been using his platform on CNN, a truly respected news authority (compared to Fox News even a local station is considered less bias), he's now re-hashing conspiracy theories that Barack Obama is not an American citizen because he was born in Hawaii.



The issue isn't an issue at all. Why are we attacking the president for things that aren't necessary for or detrimental to the direction of our country? This has nothing to do with our failing economy, bringing our troops home or universal health care. Is there nothing else to talk about? The only reason this would be important to anyone would be to devalidate Barack Obama's election to the presidency. None of this is relevant. Roland Martin is absolutely correct. Why is there a need to add another hurdle for future presidents to cross unless it's to overturn the out and out trample of John McCain in the election. Lou Dobbs, your satisfaction doesn't mean anything to anyone but you. Get over it. Stop making this an issue, if he's a citizen then why does he have to prove it?

I've said it before and I'll say it again. There have always been racist snakes in the grass. But when you cut it, they're much more visible. Thank you Mr. Martin for being a souped up Dixie Chopper.